Today is AWESOME!
I got to praise my heart out as I sang with my choir member for the congregation and I got to feel the presence of God within me.
It's December! And with December coming means Christmas is coming and indeed, today is the first Advent already. How fast time flies and another year is about to end. I will be 25 in about 5 weeks time and once a friend of mine asked me what had I accomplished or want to accomplished in this 1/4 part of my life.
I thought about that question for a while and I am happy to learn that in my 25 years of living, I had accomplished what had become my desire all these while. Firstly, it had always been my desire to be a writer and though at the moment I might say that my writing career has just started, but I am glad that at least as I wait to become 25, or rather, when I'm 25, I will get to see my first article being published!
It is by God's grace I got to work in Eagles Communication, a Christian non-profit organization that publicize a bi-monthly Christian magazine, Vantage Point and as part of my desire (no.2), it has always been my desire as well to be use as an instrument for God and now, with my writing, I hope I am living the dream.
The number 3 wish list that I want to accomplish in life is to go to bible school. And I am glad that last year and late this year I got to attend 2 bible classes at Singapore Bible College, where I learnt the Old Testament Study. Currently awaiting my next semester next year, I hope I can get the chance to attend some of the elective classes that they offer in January 2014. Apart from writing, and pursuing theology, I enjoy dancing. Hip Hop Dancing!
I first got my first taste of dance when I saw Nsync about 13 years ago and I...so intrigued by their dance moves, tried to make a copy by routinely following and 'reading' their dance steps. I wouldn't call myself a dancer, but I do love dancing. And in my school days, I allowed myself to explore with a few dance movements, I tried Salsa, which I enjoyed tremendously, I tried belly dance (somewhere last year), I tried contemporary Jazz, and still finally, I go back to my first love again, HIP HOP and last year, together with an old friend, finally I got to live out my no.4 wish list, which is to learn dancing as we got ourselves into HIP HOP class and I TOTALLY, TRULY, WHOLE HEARTEDLY LOVE!!!! THE EXPERIENCE! (and I'm so gonna go back there again once I am much settled with my currently job)
And Yeah! to think if I had accomplished all that I want to accomplish in my life, I would say I do! or at least some parts of it. And I am really happy to know that.
As for my new year's resolution, and probably future mission, I hope that as I mentioned above, I hope I can continue to be an instrument of God. I always pride myself to be a writer and reader and thus, writing is my life and my passion, and I will love to see myself writing and be a true writer, saving lives, transforming lives, entertaining lives....etc. through my writings, be it facts or fictions; and I hope that someday I can open a Christian library.
I've been through some Christian Book stores recently and nothing more amazed me than Mass Media Ministry, at Playfair, Tai Seng. For God's wonderful sake, that book store is like a warehouse! It's awesome! with (I don't know) probably millions of books and publications can be found in there. I was rejoicing at heart when I weaved myself from shelves to shelves. There are so many brilliant books in there and with affordable prizes! Fantastic!
And talking about Christian books, there has been, I realized evangelical explosion going on on the internet as well; with sermons and e-books from authors like Francis Chan, Crazy Love being put online, and with several others...It is amazing!
So, ya...my mission for the future is hopefully able to create a conducive Christian Library for evangelism to takes place among people. And as it has been my desire to reach out to non-believers, I hope that non-Christians out there, or even Christians, who are troubled with doubts, challenges and/or temptations can find some insights from the library. As they read and sit and seek God from books, study guides, bible guides, testimonies, sermon transcripts (if there are), devotions, CDs etc. My desire is that God's name be glorified and those people who are hungry and thirsty out there, who are looking for living water, a meadow, a rest, can find it.
Other future mission and visions that I hope to accomplish, well...maybe I will write it in some other posts. Not that I have not thought about it, but...I think it will be too much info. to share at the moment. Afterall, we never know what comes tomorrow.
Moving on, as I am writing this, it got me to reflect upon my own relationship with God recently. I noted I've been busy. And along with other pressures, I found myself struggling to pray. To have a moment alone with God. I was occupied. Saddened. Overloaded. Fatigue. Saved all the details, but anyway, today I am glad that in this first advent, I am able to sing for God. I am able to encounter God, praised Him. Worshipped Him and pray. Releasing all the burdens I've been feeling. And myself find rest in Him.
A little sharing about what I've been through, recently in the workplace, I had been struggling to work with someone. She is not a malicious person I know. But she is I would say, like a stubborn ass that only want to work her way around and refuse to listen to others opinion. I have to be honest, I found myself disliking the fact that I have to work very closely with her. And to make matters worst, her own mind which is like the weather, is unpredictable. And a few times I found myself being misunderstood. I, for one thing, hate misunderstanding, especially when good intentions was made the opposite. Really, it was unbearable.
I hate to admit the fact that I dislike her way of working, and I dislike working with her, but today, in the presence of God, and in his holy place, I admitted. I. don't like. and. have. difficulty. working. with. her.
However, I am glad, that although it is not a very nice confession after all. And it is a sin. I know; but...I am glad that God knows my heart's burden. and He is releasing it for me.
I feel so much at peace when I confessed that fact. And being honest with God, I told him, I don't like working with her. I wish for strength to work along, but really I have to confess, I dislike working with her.
Once again God thought me to be honest and I'm glad I made it.
You see sometimes, when I think about this thing that God had done in my life, it got me to realize that actually, it is not that hard to live our Christian living in this life. One way to do this is to come as frankly as you should with God as you have to with yourself. No one knows your own likes and dislikes except yourself. The bible said that no one knows a man's heart and thoughts except his soul. Similarly, no one knows your own burdens and desires except yourself. And when we are angry, or when we are pissed off with someone, or maybe burdened, no one knows how to feel it except ourselves. And the next person closes to know that hidden 'secret' is God.
I pray that everyone of us be honest with God as we are with ourselves. I believe that whatever struggles you are facing with, be it heavy or light, big or small, it worth His time. It worth to be shared and it worth to be thrown out off your shoulders. And God, our God is a BIG God that can make everything possible in His hands, and that means, bringing you come face to face with your problems and see Him throw it all away from you.
I believe if only we learn to convict that truth that God is Capable, and that our lives are made able by the power of His hands, we will learn to see that conviction to live out our Christian Faith in the world is possible! Living a holy living, be honest, forgive, surrender, renewed, recommitted etc...you name it, is POSSIBLE because God is with us, and because he is with us, we can do all things through Him who gave us strength. (Phillipians 4:13)
May your spirit dwells in Him as He does in you. For truly, he is our Immanuel!
Happy Advent 1 :)
Me ~
